your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
pray to the hookup gods
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
