i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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