how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
