38 yer olds are good kisserssss
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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