paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
