That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
