Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
