Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Need sex. Gaining weight.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize