i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
