brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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