just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
