I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
