I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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