See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
