I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
