Whod you bang
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
