if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
