I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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