So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
the day after is always just damage control
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize