Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Alive.
So much puke
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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