So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize