his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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