I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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