He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Randomize
