yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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