Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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