So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
