The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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