Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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