do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize