shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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