dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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