4 words: hood of his car
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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