I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
