Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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