Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
