I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
