make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
