I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
