Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
