I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize