I hate your face
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
So much Jack, so little girl.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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