I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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