we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
