their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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