it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
