You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
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