you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
