You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
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