so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
