fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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